Jolly Viking, part 11


Luga 26th Missile Brigade 1529 zulu

-General, all launchers have new targets and are ready to launch!

-Yest. Now we wait for the final go. Give me the target list and timings… what’s this targets 23 and 24… oh suka, moving targets… updates coming and going to launchers?

-Da, every two seconds. They are big… and slow moving targets, sir!

-Okay, give me the handle. I’ll speak to the boys… 26th Missile Brigade soldiers! Very soon we will blow some serious steam. We will launch in intervals, wait for your number! Your Motherland will be proud of you, we will crush the enemy and force it to knees! This is what we are for! This is your General-Major Larimov. Out.

Timing. You would think that it’s just the same when the missiles hit, after all these targets were far away from each others and would get the same devastation… but this was the first strike. It’s psychological impact was as important as the physical one, actually it was much more… They planned to hit all targets at the same second. 24 four ton missiles with 800kg warheads coming from the sky at mach 7, you can’t hear those coming by the way, and blowing off at the same time will cause massive chaos in communications networks, emergency services, military, media, social media, international media, political decision-making… you just name it. It will show that the enemy can do almost what ever they want. And this Iskander missile had nuclear capability. But they were not planning to use nukes. Not yet. They have shown with the dirty bombs that they can do it and are ready for it, if needed. By contaminating the Lovisa nuclear plant area they blocked out the option that Finn’s could explode it against their advancing troops. And the psychological impact was huge. Finland just celebrated its 100th birthday and this whole Russian operation was bigger than Pearl Harbor. Nuclear holocaust was now in every Finns head. Iskander was a missile that could be controlled in all phases, from the launch till the target. It had its own decoys and electronic jamming capabilities, it could evade anti-ballistic missiles, but Finn’s didn’t have those. And NATO wouldn’t shoot those because… reasons. And the Finnish Air Defense’s best missile was AMRAAM, middle range missile, the land version. They have it also on the F-18 Hornets but those were on the way to Sweden. It had a kill probability of 59% against air targets but against mach 7 Iskanders… zero. Iskander was a single stage missile, it had mass over 4500kg, the energy at speed of 2100m/s even if the warhead doesn’t blow… was enormous. It’s bunker buster version had a hard metal penetrator and could get through 8 meters of concrete. They have also other goals with this strike… and there was two other Brigades with missiles ready at Carelian Isthmus and near Murmansk…

-General! Flash message, Moscow, category A! Launch, launch, launch!…

NATO HQ’s Brussels 1530 zulu

-Sir! Iskander launch, north of Luga, 26th Missile Brigade! All units, looks like a mass launch, yes, 24 missiles now heading at sector 292 – 329 to Finland!

-Alert all units, track, if they enter our NATO airspace, destroy! Inform Finland and… fuck, everyone! This can’t be hide…

-Yes, sir! All units, all units, this is not a drill, this is not a drill…

The NATO War room start to bust like never before. This didn’t happen even during the Cold War, no missiles were launch from USSR or Russia to Europe since… ever. And now 24 nuclear capable medium range missiles were flying towards Finland 2000km per hour. And their range was like 500km or more. The dots on the screen were now in reality under heavy radar pinging and tracking. Missiles send data from that via satellite and straight links back to Russia, it was giving a full report of everything around it in real-time. Real time. Real time to target one was roughly 17 minutes… no, 16…



Finnish Army HQ’s , secret bunker near Helsinki 1531 zulu

-Sir! Missiles heading from Luga region! Full launch! 24 missiles!

-Perkele, that must be some joke… show me!

-General here! On big screen now! That’s straight from NATO headquarters via Swedish link! Estimated flight time 16 minutes…

-Oh my God… if those had nuke heads… fuck. Where will those hit…

-Sir, we should sound the alarm.

-Alarm? Yes. Hit the button. Alarm everything. Every mother fucking thing! Try shooting them with something. And get ready, we are probably one of those targets… Mr. President, if I may, I would advise you to get the hell out of here with your crew. You have 15 minutes to get in that APC and drive fast away from this point, understand? We need command structure and here are now president and the head of army… shit the whole HQ…

-General Kaski… this bunker will hold? If we stay…

-No, this won’t hold a bunker buster. I urge you, please leave. Now!

-General, I’m very sorry for all this. I fucked up…

-Sauli. Run Perkele! Run!

-yes… of course… where’s my bodyguards? Fuck fuck fuck….

-Stunnberg, you should go also.

-General Kaski, I will stay here. There will be always some one leading this shit. You know that.

-24 missiles. They can wipe out our whole command structure if they know where we are.

-General, don’t worry about that now. Let’s try to save some civilians. Push the alarm in every city, coastline, television, radio, internet… all what there is. Now!

-Yes, sir. Sorry sir. Okay, Listen up! Use every channel we have, alert of missiles, they can hit anywhere, we have 14 minutes! Go Go Go! This is not a drill! Saatana! And stop calling your homes! We have a Nation to save! Captain there, call national broadcasting company, put the emergency alert running on TV… text: seek shelter, possible missile strike in south Finland, follow our updates, repeat seek shelter…

…and so in few minutes whole Finland was in a state of horror coma. Of course they thought it was going to be the end of World, a nuclear strike. Funny how people act when they lose the thin layer of civilization or social behavior on their gray layer on brains and start acting on the fear of death. It was horrible. Gun fanatics battled up and took on the street, those ”preppers” did the same but they had a plan, an individual own survival plan… they rushed with guns and cars to the markets, pharmacies, gas stations… Older people just locked their doors and stared the TV, younger people rushed into the net, facebook, whatever and started to yell, they filled internet with chaotic information and the next thing was that this popped up in all media centers and newsrooms in the World… Breaking… NATO has confirmed… and then there was those who rushed with their cameras and phones, periscopes, live feeds and whatevers to the streets and published everything. That moment… it became one of the biggest moments in media history…

Russia Moscow, NDCC Cyber Department 1530 zulu

General Topor was thriving. This was her dubstep. Information war dubstep. Death step. They actually played some psytrance and one of the screens was showing these fractals and bubbles and deep shit stuff. It was the new generation that ruled…

-Okay, Listen up! We have a launch! Push out operation ”Red Bear”! Social media, go for the ”Apocalypse!” theme, fill net with rumors of a nuclear attack, say that those are nukes! It will catch like fire! Time is now 1530 in London, it’s morning in USA and markets are opening! Let’s burn some money! Okay, spread rumors that the Russian oil lines from Baltic Sea are blocked and those missiles will cause gas and oil exports to drop 60% from Russia, we need to get the oil price up! Like skyrocket! Like a fucking Iskander, da!? Yeah! And keep Finnish net open! We need to get those booms and fireworks to the world! And remind that those are some bloody damn accurate missiles! And made in Russia! Okay, little green men now all over Finland! Keep that military coup shit up! We will get stuff were Finnish police is shooting looters and other similar, use that! And ethnic cleansing! Finns are now hunting Russian civilians in Finland! We will get that stuff soon too! …Oh what?

-I said we have already! Here’s video from Helsinki, some far-right people are beating two Russians on the street, hard-core, kicking on the head, bloody as fuck, one is woman…

-Great! Make that boom all over, route that to our media, that will be in category ”Breaking!”. Okay, we have 14 minutes to the Big Bang! Be ready, there will be stuff on Finnish facebook, twitter, whatevers and all over, take that shit and go for it! The World is going to shit its pants! This is our Bear roar! You don’t fuck the Bear, the Bear…

-…Fucks You!

They all shouted those last words and rushed to their posts. This was a fucking mayhem. This was going to be Natalya Topor’s Triumph. She will be the next Information Minister or what would they call that post anyway, in the next Russian government. That will show the arrogant British Londoners that who is who… fucking Rothamn’s Media Academy…

-Hey, you are the Swedish departments team leader?

-Yes, whats up?

-I’m coming with you, need to brief you more about the operation ”Side Step”

-Oh that. It’s up?

-They will go for it. Need to check some details. Some changes.

-Gotska Sandö?

-Da. It’s a bold fuck. Some bold fuck…

And so internet was starting to ripple and burn, routers were heating, pixels were flicking, millions of coolers pushing offices air hot making workers sweating, lithium batteries drying, slowly but steady the words ”What the fuck?” were filling the air… It was amazing how things that happen 10 000 miles away were suddenly in real-time, real time on your eyes and ears, and on millions of eyes and ears… there was already hundreds of live streams from Finland looking to the sky, alarms were sounding, people were yelling and chaos was burning. This was going to be mental Bonfire. Knife party. Road to Valhalla. Nobody want’s live forever. Some deep shit. Or as those base jumpers would say ”Super Cool” or something like that. Horror and chaos porn. Stuff that western media loves. Or the commercials love. Red Bull logo on a machine gun. The whole idea was use Western media and its weak point: click baiting, scandals, booms and bangs, sex against itself. And gain some serious points to Russia. To make it Big. They were already the bad guys so they thought that what the fuck, let’s be bad then in big time! But they had also another plan, to get oil prices raising, western economics in chaos and Russian reputation back to its feared and USSR era greatness. After those missiles will hit, all armies in the world will turn their heads to Russian military industries that made cheap bulk stuff but now have proven to make a damn accurate and working missile. Sad that it had to be Finland. But geopolitics has no emotions…


*secret* /A/2b
Target list A/26th/1.323/Finland 071217/MscwHQ/NDCC/GenShg/ ++final++
8/Helsinki/Pasila/YLE broadcasting
estimated hit time 2048mscw all warheads conventional,
except 8 *bunkerbuster*
=> no NATO targets / no NATO targets / no NATO targets <= 

The final target list came out of the printer. General Natalya Topor looked it and smiled. Some serious flames and in just few minutes. She looked at the big screen and the dots were flying steady like birds. On one screen was a live pict of one of the Iskanders, it was still pointing up on the dark sky but it steadily started to lower the angel and they see the black horizon against last rays of sun and the small light points down there some where. She checked the target number and the missile and it was heading to Kymi-river/Keltti. Then she realized that they were going to flood Kymi-river all the way down to Kotka, Baltic Sea… Sweet Lord our planners are some motherfucker geniuses, she thought and jumped on the table to see the screen better. Earth, Water and Fire.

Bonfire. That was her code-name in FSB…


… —…

…to be continued… stay tuned…

This is fiction, raw method one. With some hard facts. Deal with it. 😉

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Jolly Viking, part 11

7 kommenttia artikkeliin ”Jolly Viking, part 11

  1. Mannerheim sanoo:

    Ballistic missiles used against moving targets. LOL.

    What a science fiction.

    One thing these kind of youngster scenarions forget is price. All military equipment has it’s price. ABMs are not cheap and one surely won’t shoot flies with them…


    1. ABM is anti-ballistic missile, like Patriot. This Iskander is actually not a ”ballistic” missile, it’s what we have called old school ”tykistö-ohjus” (artillery-missile) like the Scud.

      It isn’t actually expensive, it is much cheaper to send Iskander than send a fighter-bomber to take out a similar target (800kg explosives deep inside enemy territory >500km).
      Russia used those in Georgia 2008 and ie in Gori took out 28 tanks with a hit to garrison with a single missile.


  2. kijiku sanoo:

    Iskander has also a cruise missile so they can launch ”ballistic” trajectory and ”stealth” one at same time.
    This forces enemy to use its radars etc. In whole spectrum and makes defending much harder. 😢
    Iskander is kinda updated V2 rocket but much much more accurate. 5 meters or less. With almost 1 ton warhead it is scary beast. It is also numbless to multiple countermeasures and has also airburst warhead and others. 😨
    It really is a weapon Russia would use because it is effective and shows enemy fast that ”resistance is futile”. Yes they have used it in Georgia and Ukraine. 😣
    Would Russia use 24 of them against Finland? Why not? Besides if Russia uses 3 brigades they can launch 72 at once. Reloading takes 20 to 40 minutes and then again 72. 144 targets out in one hour. Can Finland or Sweden prevent that kinda attack? No. 😱

    Liked by 1 henkilö

    1. You should feel the vibes here in FIN. People are like lambs nodding to Russia and ”understanding” Russias intrests. One hockey coach said in radio that ”if you poke them they poke back” meaning the sanctions. Totally forgetting Crimea.
      Also the clown Harkimo from Kokoomus party is heading for the new head of their party. He is owned by oligarchs Rotenberg and Tymshenko.
      During Cold War the right wing here was in real horror about Russia but now they are like best friends. Just like Trump.
      Russia is the most corrupted system in the world so what does it tell about us? That we are letting this happen?
      It also explains a lot of our president’s actions. And not in a good way…



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