Jolly Viking, part 2.

Finland, near Jyväskylä, 61.8151504, 24.9540281 0410 zulu

Paavo Mustonen was driving his Toyota Hi-Ace van to his friends small forest plant he has bought some years ago. ”Time to cut some trees” has his friend said on the text message, ”got some vodka also ;)” he had add to the message. Well, you got to help a friend even it’s a dark December day with slight hangover after the Independence holiday. Besides, Alexander ”Lexa” was a guy you didn’t say no… he was his GRU group leader. Major Alexander Tshetyakov.


Russians were stunned how easily they could  bought land from vital and strategic areas in Finland years ago. That was not possible in Russia. Law prohibited it, besides who the hell wanted to buy Russian soil? This small plant was just few hundred meters wide piece next to noise railway and a high voltage electric lines. They got it cheap, few thousand euros and it was a perfect cover for their nasty operation they were ordered to do: blow up the railway so that the train will knock out also the electric poles. They also wired few mines to slow down the rescuers and repairing units. That railway was supposed to transport massive amount of Finnish Army equipment and supplies, also that electric line was feeding Finnish Air Force HQ’s and part of Jyväskylä, a big city in Middle Finland. And their GRU Group wasn’t the only one working, there was 15 groups on the run at that moment. And other groups that didn’t even know of each others, good old USSR era precautions and secrecy…

Swedish Armed Forces HQ’s 7th December 0500 zulu.

-Staffan, have you seen this report from Gotland’s listening post? Looks like three Russian subs are heading to south west 25km from Gotland. Also Kaliningrad aviation is very busy but they are avoiding our airspace and seem to protect more their fleet that is scattered all over Baltic Sea…

-They are flying over the gas pipe. Just like we said, that fucking pipe is a devils invention…

-Should we send more planes to monitor?

-No, let NATO do that. We have enough data from our radars, just keep them armed and hot to get airborne in 30 seconds. They haven’t attack us, yet.

-We have 6 planes ready, two are airborne. And the elint piper is over Gotland now. NATO has contacted us and says it will share us all their intel.

-Good. Put North also in alert and give Norway a permission to fly in our airspace. We will have a drill with them in two hours. Close the Finnish border and secure all gas stations.

-Finnish border sir?

-Yes, can’t let civilians jam our roads. We could be in war in few hours. Jävla Rysskies…

-But Finnish president said it is a peace keeping drill?

-That’s bullshit. He is lying. Don’t know why. He could be kidnapped or something. Finnish HQ’s are not commenting anything at the moment. Bad sign. We have no idea what’s going on there. But we have to prepare for the worse.

-Copy that sir. That Finnish pilot we saved is now at Karlskrona, should we interview him?

-Yes. Send someone there and ask what the hell is going on. And send our intel to NATO about those subs.

-Absolut herr Amiral.

Helsinki Finland, 0255 zulu.

Finnish colonel Turto was in civilian clothing and step of from the metro at Sörkkä station. He waited that people left the platform and then walked back to the tunnels. He stopped for a moment behind a corner to see if anyone was following. Nobody was. He continued to a iron door and knocked three times. Someone asked a password, ”Kylmä Laukku” he said and the door opened. He was pointed with MP5 and a captain behind the pointing soldier said friendly ”Wassap colonel, cold morning?”. He smirked and said ”fuck you too”. Then the captain ordered the soldier to lay down his gun and they shake hands.

-Is the group ready?

-We are waiting 5 guys, they are on their way. First company is ready, second one is getting armed right now.

-Good, send the first one to entry point one. Total radio silence. Where’s the General? Need to have a coffee with him.

-This way sir.

They walked through series of doors and entered a bunker where was officers and soldiers in full combat gears. Big map was on the table and the smell of  fresh coffee was mixed up with gun oil, the smell he loved in the mornings…

-General, never thought this would come or did we?

-Ah, Turto perkele! Nice to see you. Have some coffee, our instinct was right. Just like we feared. Shit is going to hit the fan and we are going to bloody make it blow back to Russkies face…

-Any information about the east border?

-They are massing 6th Army and Alakurtti is mobilized with more stuff coming through railways. Radio intel says also that VDV is in full alert, Omsk is moving, Naro-Fominsk is loading tanks on trains, also their Air Force is flying on our border low and their AWACS are airborne over Carelia. All crossing points to Russia are closed from their side, massive truck jam at Vaalimaa right now. And other similar stuff. It’s going right as we predicted.

-You heard what president said? Peace keeping drills?

-Yes, he has lost it. It is now our job to protect this country and people.

-Yes it is. Wouldn’t never believe he would say that kinda thing though, you heard the order he gave to our HQ’s? That no mobilizing?

-Yes, that was horrible. Not event a silent mobilization. That guy believes he has superman powers to negotiate with Putin. That stupid bitch went in to the friendship trap, just like our leaders before.

-So, have we contact and isolated our government already? I suppose they are at Arkadia now?

-They are in crises meeting, waiting president to arrive there in few minutes. Our first strike team is ready and the guards at parliament building are on our side. We have closed traffic around the area, Russian embassy is also under surveillance. Police doesn’t know anything yet, can’t trust them right now, but they will step on our side after we take command. Navy is watching the harbor and we have airport under control right after we give the order. We have radar silence, they managed to hit our network with some bloody clever cyber attack, now we are mobilizing our AA military stuff, will be soon fully operational.

-Any contacts with NATO yet?

-Not official ones.

-Sweden, Baltics, Norway?

-They are all gearing up. Sweden will let Norway and Danes in, I suppose they are NATO member in 24 hours. USA will fly with nuclear bombers over Atlantic Northern Sea and is heating up a Carrier group from Iceland towards Norway.

-Storm is gathering…

-Sir, just in, president is now at the government emergency room. All except foreign minister Soini. He has lung fever and can’t join. He is there via video-call though.

-Oh fuck, cut that video-call immediately. Russians are watching it! Send someone to his house and put him under arrest. Before the Russians do it! That lazy selfish man. Dumb ass..

-Sir, I ordered first company to entry point one. Shall we start?

-Everyone listen up, operation Savior: execute. Surround Russian embassy, close all civilian traffic to Helsinki, secure Helsinki airport and take over our parliament building and arrest our government and president. Gentleman, battle stations!

-Yes sir!

NATO HQ’s Brussels, 0645 zulu.

-Sir, just game in, Finnish Army HQ’s is sending full mobilization orders to all troops. Navy also. They are using radars again. They repeat that message in rows, note that they keep saying that this is not a drill.

-Holy shit, what about their commander in chief?

-We have lost contact on the Finnish government one hour ago. Reports from Helsinki that all traffic has stopped, except some military units. Russian embassy is surrounded, Helsinki Airport is closed. They are sending that mobilization news at their TV now non stop. Also a message via Baltics that there might be a ”coup” going on.

-Looks like Finns don’t like that ”peace keeping drill” with Russians idea…

-They are wise people. Never underestimate them. Their politicians may sometimes do stupid things but this shows willingness. Have we any other source for that coup?

-Just coming in from Finnish broadcasting company, on your screens now…

”…Citizens of Finland, our government has just resigned and we have now Marshall laws. President Niinistö has given his command of Army Forces to General Stunnberg who will speak in few moments. Since our internet is under heavy cyber attack, listen to your radios and follow news about mobilization orders. We recommend to stay insides and avoid panic. This is not a war. We are not in war, this is just mobilization. Our leadership is having discussions with Russia and EU leaders are now in emergency meeting in Bryssles. More information soon. Stay tuned, we will cover this situation live here on all channels…”

-Wou. This is it. They kicked president out and the government. They are going to full war mode. That is bold.

-Sir, also report from Swedish intel, three Russian subs heading to Danish Straits.

-Oh fuck, they are trying to block our NATO fleet from getting in to Baltic Sea…

-Sir, we must send ASW’s and stop them with depth charges. Not necessarily destroy them, just scare them away. They know that we can do massive damage to their Fleet, we have six missiles to each ship, a surprise attack will destroy 70% of them in 30 minutes.

-Won’t we be in full war then?

-Yes. But they might want to avoid a war with NATO. This operation they are doing is aimed against Finland. Finland has very good shipyards, they make the best icebreakers in the world, they have good infra and Finland would resolve two of their goals: buffer zone and control of Baltic Sea. They believe that Finland and Sweden will join NATO sooner or later so this is also a operation against that.

-Yes, that has been hanging in the air for awhile now. And Putin is a Leningrad guy. He has datchas and a personal praying datcha at Valaam monastery. Also Dugin and other hard core nationalists like to hide there. Their paranoia about ”NATO expansion” is just nuts. But a serious narrative in their propaganda. Now we don’t know who is in real control of Finland, can we find that out, and please really fast…

-Sir, president Niinistö has just tweeted that he will resign!

-Okay, he was pushed over. But by who? Is this a military coup?

-Sir, video of Finnish Army troops storming their parliament building now on youtube!

-Lets see… hmmm… the guards are letting them in, no gunfire, are their storming or securing? Is there some parliament members hand cuffed?

-We have recognized her, she is prime ministers special advisor. She has tight contacts with Russia. Also Russian embassy is blocked. They are tightening up their security on high levels, looks like a coup but actually… isn’t?

-We have to wait the new governments announcements. But it is not relevant right now. Mobilization orders are real and Russia is closing their border and massing up over 130k strong forces to Finnish borders. And they have annexed Aland. And there are dead people on the media…

Helsinki Finland, 0410 zulu.

First Company moved fast and had their laser pointers on in the dark tunnels. They have done this multiple times, Helsinki has a huge network of tunnels under it and they know how to use them. They popped up behind the parliament building, second company arrived with AMV’s from the front. It took only two minutes to get to the governments meeting room and they secured the whole building in five. It was now a bastion. General Kaski arrived to the meeting room…

-Hello and perkele to you all, mr President, ministers and others. By the law of Finnish War time protocol I strongly recommend that you all sit down and listen what I have to say. You are all fired.

-General, I am the commander of Finnish Army, president of Finland Sauli Niinistö. I order you to resign and stop this nonsense. This is a coup for Christ sake!

-No, Sauli, you are now a traitor. You have made a deal with Russia and let them annex our land. And refused to defend our citizens. And you, dear ministers, have done nothing to stop this nonsense.

-But vittu saatana, General Kaski, I am the defense minister and I have something to say also, you have no idea to handle this situation. We are actively trying to resolve…

-Actively resolve. Like what? Talking about minefields for years and playing the far-right idiotic games? Your incompetence had ruined our political and military command structure. You are just a armchair general… no armchair sergeant who had let piss occupy the thinking zone. Just like your boss, foreign minister Soini who is not allowed to touch Russia. That is reserved to our Sauli who is a whimp and a lawyer.

-I am prime minister. Do you really understand what you are doing here, General?

-This is not me. We. We the people of Finland. And we represent them now. Until we have the new government in power.

-But we have been democratically elected! We are representing Finns, you forget that?

-You don’t have the support of people anymore. You betrayed them. You let Russia took Åland. You have announced that we are having ”peace drills” with them…

-But that was the president who said…

-Shut the fuck up. I’m tired of your never ending political bullshit. Your incompetence is devastating to us. You have lost your moral compass. You are seeing things only trough money and profit. This ends now.

General reached his pocket and draw out a paper.

-Here is a list of Russian nuclear company Rosatoms money transfers. It looks like even president Niinistö has got secret funding through that Russian hockey team Jokerit, also you Ollie Rehn, have massive pile of that mafia money somewhere… looks like London bank to me. Here, have a look…

He gave that paper to go around, ministers went white on their faces, one of them start crying.

-You all have gave Russia an open invitation to Finland. You are selling this land by piece by piece. This is betrayal. We can publish this. We have it already copied and confirmed. It only takes one tweet to get it around the world. Now the question is, how do we proceed. Do we crush you public and have a new government trough elections? When Russia is attacking us, when we are in war against them? What do you think, millionaire and prime minister Sipilä?

-Umh… my name isn’t spelled right on this list. It could be some one else…

-Great, still thinking your own reputation when our nation is facing war. You bloody fools. This meeting makes me just more convinced that this is the only and right way to do it. Let’s go public, Captain, you have video running from this?

-All the time General, never stopped.

-Wait…wait… I didn’t know that this will go this far. When I talked with Putin he said many things, he said that he has bribed everyone. That he can crush down any government. So we played this just to expose him. We were going to reveal all this after the Football World Cup 2018. I swear! As a president I had to take the money. He said he would feel very upset if his money to help Finland wasn’t good. And he promised a very nice nuclear reactor to us!

-While you are trying to talk yourselves out of this, we have put our HQ in full order. We are starting full mobilization. We have also secured our main media channels, that’s going strictly under the law of War time preparations. Our internet is down cause Russia has managed to cut it, everyone is listening radios and watching TV right now. They believed that you, Sauli Niinistö, have the power to lead this shit alone. But as you can see, you have been so blind to all directions. Now, we can play this nice, like that you can be still our government but do as we say, or have new dramatic elections which is very complicated now because war. Or we sack you and form a war time government, with your help to keep citizens calm. And we keep this list of your corruption still under the table. I remind you that Russia has 120.000 soldiers at our border right now. I give you 5 minutes to discuss this. We will wait behind the door.

Finland, near Jyväskylä, 61.8151504, 24.9540281 0510 zulu

Pavel Tsornoye aka Paavo Mustonen, used his chainsaw to cut some trees that blocked the road behind them while Lexa was molding some plastic explosives to right shape to cut the railroad steel so that a train would crash to the right direction. That train would smash into the electric poles at over 100kmh and cause a massive pile of death and horror. And the mines around that area will force the rescue operation into halt. And one of the mines had small amount of strontium in it in a lead container. Dirty indeed. One other group was working near Lyly, a Finnish Army depot and had similar idea. The radiation will slow down everything, they knew everything about Finnish authorities working methods and protocols about these things. These guys loved their job. They were recruited from the Russian streets in 90’s, young master criminals who were mostly orphans or poor kids who had abusive drunk parents and so on. They were sent to Finland  some years ago via Estonia as workers, lived a good life in West, enjoyed freedom and got Finnish citizenship after a while. There was 80.000 Russians in Finland and it was just so damn easy to hide there. Besides police never asked papers, countryside was practically empty and Finland had this ”gray economic” area were it was so easy to move money and avoid taxes. It was practically under governments protection: the right wing parties supported cheap labor as they do all over the world. And if you helped the right officials with little presents, no problemo. But now it has come the time when Russia activated these sleepers and agents. Lexa push the primer into the plastic explosives, tested the timer and sprayed some black paint over it. Pavel drove the car to the path of the train crash coming, it was also loaded with explosives. Then they walked to a near hidden car, had a long warming gulp of vodka and waited. Snow was slowly drifting in the air…

…to be continued…

… — …

This is fiction. All rights reserved. Stay tuned… 😉

Sorry for not correct English. Not my first language. 😛






Jolly Viking, part 2.


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